Mystery Man

On November 29, 2015 I wrote the following in my journal:

I dreampt that I’d kissed him, so I had to make a list to remind myself not to get fixated on him. 

1.  He’s judgmental of those battling substance abuse.

2.  He’s uncomfortable talking about sexual topics.

3.  He has a very cut-and-dry, black-and-white view of life.

4.  He has made multiple jokes about women submitting.

5.  He speaks derisively about Mormons and Jehovah’s Witnesses.

6.  He has a very unhealthy lifestyle and no apparent desire for betterment.

7.  My continuing uncertainty about his sexual orientation

8.  Our age difference

9.  He mentions the Bible a lot (gave me flashbacks of my exes M & S).

I cannot, for the life of me, remember who this was about.  I’ve wracked my brain, and can only conclude that it was someone I knew in the U.S. before I’d moved to Korea. 

So, there’s a sexually repressed, possible gay, unhealthy eating, non-exercising, sexist

Bible thumper, who is intolerant of other religions, is ten years younger or older, doesn’t believe in grey areas, and is insensitive to people with substance addictions, who used to talk to me years ago.  My thirsty sub-conscience dredged him up for a kiss, I awoke and jumped out of bed to write a list to ensure that I wouldn’t give him a chance in the future. Whew!  Whoever he is, I’ve since completely blocked him out of my mind because nobody I can think of fits this description completely. There is one man who almost fits them all, but he exercises, and I don’t recall questioning his sexuality.

Adam Was a Filthy Man & Robert Mugabe Leads Bible Study

Adam Was a Filthy Man Who Stepped on His Wife

The international church I attend in Tokyo did service on Zoom, as usual, but this time the sermon was preached by guest minister, Pastor Urashima.  In the sermon he mentioned Adam’s reaction when God asked him why he had eaten fruit from the forbidden tree   (Genesis 3:11-12).  “What a filthy man!  God asks him a question and he immediately steps on his wife and blames her!”  SO glad I wasn’t listening in person, because, when I heard that part, I hollered!  Maybe it was a combination of his accent and choice of words, but I thought it was hilarious.    

Robert Mugabe Leads an Online Bible Study

My friend posted a Bible study video from her church.  I watched a few minutes of it, then had to stop.  There was nothing wrong with lesson itself, it’s just that the pastor/elder/deacon or whoever the man was leading the lesson was the spitting image of Robert Mugabe.  I was laughing too hard to hear anything he had to say. 

I might be enjoying some of these online church services too much, and for the wrong reasons.  When the COVID-19 crisis finally ends, I won’t know how to act in church.  Sitting here laughing at all the wrong things.  I don’t even feel bad about it, either.  This isolation stuff can be a downer.  And it rained all day today, too.  Might as well get a few laughs in to keep the depression away. 

And one of the people who attended last week’s online service went by the user name”Sexxy M.” I have questions for her...

18 April 2020   

Talking to Me Like I’m an Idiot Child

The nurse at School C talks to me like I’m an idiot child.  She talks to me loudly, super-slowly, and over-enunciates every syllable.  When I arrive in the mornings, she says, “O-HA-YO-GO-ZAI-MASU!”  I don’t even think she knows that doing that sends the message that she thinks I’m unintelligent.  Just a typical Japanese person who doesn’t know how to act around non-Japanese people.  Even Kyoto-sensei once laughed at her exaggerated way with me.  It’s annoying because (a) I’m not dimwitted, (b) I’ve been in Japan for over two years.  I know a lot more than she thinks. 

One time I was passing out okashi to the staff.  When I left one on her desk, she said “Arigato gozaimasu!” To which I responded, “Dooitashimashite.”  The broad almost fell out of her chair.   Wow!  The foreigner knows howo to say you’re welcome in Japanese, and such good pronunciation, too!

Just when I was getting ready to tell her that I’m not mentally disabled, so don’t talk me so slowly (I was practicing the sentence), schools were shut down because of the COVID-19 and I didn’t get a chance.  In retrospect, it’s just as well, because that sentence isn’t right. I don’t even talk to special education students like that.  They’re not stupid.  They just learn differently or more slowly.  Maybe the next foreigner she speaks to that way will set her straight.  Hopefully.   

Sexism in the Classroom

The sixth grade home room teacher at School C only calls on the boys.  He asked about six questions and didn’t once call on the girls who had their hands up.  Many teachers only call on the ‘smart’ kids to ensure that the question they’ve asked will get a correct answer, but I’d never seen anything like this before.  It’s one thing to encounter this sort of thing in a rural area where people’s way of thinking is still very traditional and provincial, but in a city?  I’m surprised the girls still even bother to raise their hands.  Maybe they haven’t yet noticed that he only calls on boys.

He’s about 30 years old. 

When given the chance to call on students, I always make it a point to call on a girl, then on a boy, then on a girl, and so on.  Hopefully, somebody noticed.  

2019

I am the Ajumma

My friend Michelle had taught in Korea for a year in the 1990s.  Since she’d gotten married and I’d moved to the DC area, we didn’t communicate as much.   She had no idea where I was, so I sent an e-mail to fill her in on my most recent move.   Turns out I was with the same hakwon chain she’d been with.  She’d been at the Gangnam branch, though. 

Her response was a long, enthusiastic message reminiscing about her time in Korea.  She had a wonderful time teaching adult English classes, eating dolsot bibimbap and exploring Seoul on the subways.  Her work schedule was also lighter.  She taught 07:00-11:00 and 18:00-21:00 (my schedule is 07:00-11:00 and 15:00-21:00).  Hard to imagine pre-internet and pre-cellphone Korea. 

She was really curious about how much things had changed in the 15+ years since she’d been here. “Do you have an ajumma housekeeper to cook and clean for you and the other teachers?”  Haha!  I had to tell her that many of the perks that teachers had in the 90s (and up until about 2008) have been disappearing, so I am the ajumma who cooks and cleans…especially since my roommate seems to have an allergy to mops and brooms.  Honestly, I’d hate that.  I enjoy cooking, and don’t mind doing laundry and cleaning my own space.  I wouldn’t be comfortable with someone doing those things for me. 

November 2012

“Tomorrow is Thanksgiving!”

I went to Seoul Main Church.  Almost didn’t eat because I hate walking into a big cafeteria (seems bigger when one’s alone) not knowing anyone and having to find where to sit.  Anyway, I went to sit at the back.  Two men saw me and motioned for me to sit with them.  The one with tiny bandages covering his pimples gave me his bowl of songpyeon (I like the ones with sesame seeds and honey).  “Where are you from?  Are you a missionary?  How long have you been here?”  I take some kimchi.  The one next to me looks surprised. 

When I’m almost finished, the brave one tells me that using chopsticks is very difficult.  Umm…I’m almost finished eating a bowl of noodles with them, so not difficult.  “They’re only used in China, Japan and Korea,” he continues.  Again, no.  You skipped a bunch of countries.  Besides a Vietnamese person taught me how to use them. 

Then the one next to me gets some courage and says “Tomorrow is Thanksgiving in Korea.”  The other one pipes up, “It is very important Korean holiday.”  Yes.  Thank you gentlemen.  I’ve been living in a vacuum for the last two months.  Had no idea.  That explains why I didn’t have to work yesterday!  Of course, I just smiled and nodded because they were only trying to be friendly and make conversation.  But why does every Korean have act as if I’m ignorant of the most basic facts about their country and culture?  Two days ago ‘Anna’ also explained to me that this weekend was Thanksgiving.  Chuseok is not exactly Thanksgiving (it’s a three-day harvest festival); but I won’t argue with them.  Now I know what the long-timers mean when they say they get tired of having the same conversations over and over. 

On the way back to Incheon a woman got on the train with a huge bag of some sort of cylindrical rice snacks.  I paid no attention to her and continued writing in my date book.  When the train was stopping, I felt something near my face and looked up to see her holding three big ones in my face.  I smiled and thanked her.  She smiled and got off the train.  Despite her bare hands, I bit into one.  The reddish one was quite good, but I couldn’t identify the flavor.  The white one tasted faintly of ginger.  I’ve already learned at school with the kids to not think too much about germs when they offer something to eat, but I didn’t expect to have to exercise that tactic on the train.  Mami would die! Heh!  Lo que no mata engorda. 

September 2012

What I Did During Chuseok Break

[insert pix]

I baked whole wheat bread, knot rolls, cinnamon bread and pizza from scratch.

Went to bed late and woke up late. 

Estrené the orange tunic the seamstress at Jemulpo Station underground made.

Went to Suwon Folk Village with Amanda, Martha and Olga. 

Visited Ralph in Chuncheon.  Interesting area. 

Spent time at the PC bang.

September 2012

Heritage Mass Choir

Went to a choir fest at Jang Chung Dong Church (near Dongguk Station).  Heard Heritage Mass choir along with a bunch of other groups from children to youth to adults.  Had such a great time.  The music was good, the atmosphere friendly and I was thrilled to be attending my first BSSK event.  It was organized by Taryn.  Other attendees were Janine, Elliot, Alina, Deshay and Jasmine.  I'm  especially grateful to Elliot because, during intermission, he helped me navigate the labyrinth in the lower level so I could find the toilets before I started bleeding into my shoes.

  

August 2012

“You speak Korean?!”

After lunch this young broad named Jang Ehjing comes to my table asking the usual questions:  What’s your name?  Where are you from?  What’s your major?  How long you stay in Korea?  Then after a while, she asked my age.  “I’d rather not say,” was my reply.  “Oh, it’s secret,” she said.  Then when she was talking with Mr. Park, who was also at the table, I heard her say to him “사십, 사십!”  When I asked her why she had told him that I was forty, she acted all surprised that I understood what she’d said.   “You speak Korean?!”  I do know how to count.  So this chick says “That’s your age?  I heard that you’re older than you look.” 

I wanted to say, “Listen here, trick, if I refused to tell you three minutes ago, why would I tell you now?  Besides, where do you get off telling Mr. Park info about me that you received from a third party?  And another thing, are your lives so boring that you just sit around discussing me??”  I didn’t, however, give her attitude, since I have to look at her for the next five months, but this is the second time in less than four weeks info about me has come back to me from someone I didn’t tell. Much as I hate it, I’ll have to be super-guarded with anything I say to this horde of busy bodies. Only share info I don’t mind all of them having. 

In retrospect, I should’ve let her have it, because she was nobody of consequence.  On top of everything else, it really pissed me off that she deigned to assume to know what I do and don’t know. 

While I was talking with the men from the choir, Amanda kept butting in like she always does, and repeating my questions.  It’s always annoying, but I was already peeved at Jang Ehjing, so today was not the day.  Had to tell her that I didn’t need a translator if we were speaking English.  No le gustó.  Don’t care.  I’ve been putting up with that for weeks now.  Should've said something already. 

August 25, 2012


*And yes, I know that Koreans ask each other's age upon meeting so that they know how to properly address each other.  That point, however, it moot when it comes to foreigners because they just use our names.  None of them are going to call me eonni or nuna.

A Smile & a Wink

An ajeosshi almost fell out of his seat staring at Amanda, Martha and me.  When he was getting of the train, he smiled and winked at me.  It was cute.  Amanda and Martha thought it was hilarious.  Men in Seoul are braver about openly showing their admiration for or interest in us, as opposed to how men in Incheon check us out covertly.     

August 11, 2012

Murphy’s Law for a Vegetarian

There’s a Harmony Mart supermarket two blocks from where I live.  They always play really loud dance music.  I don’t linger long in the aisles because the frantic pounding can give you a headache.  I don’t understand why it has to be so ear-splittingly loud.   Often, there’s a tallish, chubby, mustachioed man wearing a white cap, bib apron and a headset who stands near the produce section announcing the specials of the day.  He always talks to me, but I shy away because everything he says (“Where from?”  Or “Are you teacher?”) is heard by all the staff and shoppers over the loudspeaker.

One day, he wasn’t wearing the headset.  So when he beckoned me to go talk to him, I went.  He greeted me, asked what meat I liked and promised to give me a good price.  I looked down and realized the meat display case was between us.  “I don’t eat meat,” I answered.  “No meat?!”  I shook my head.  He then switched to English, as if to convince me, “Steak is delicious!”  I shrugged my shoulders apologetically.  He shook his head in disbelief either at the fact that he’d met a nonmeat-eater or that his foolproof plan to seduce me with meat discounts had crumbled. 

Just my luck:  the one guy who wants to chat me up is a butcher.

October 2012

Sasquatch Shops for Socks

After the lunchtime dance class I dropped by the park near my place.  A bunch of vendors line up their bongo trucks on one side of the park and ply their wares.  They sell everything from tools to clothing to kitchen utensils.  I’d only gone to browse, but when I saw the sock truck, I remembered that I needed socks for the upcoming cooler weather.   The grandmotherly vendor smiled and encouraged me to look through the boxes of socks she had set out on folding tables.  

I was drawn to one box which held cutesy styles.  The halmony came over, looked down at my size 41 skippies, gently took my elbow and led me over the table with men’s socks.  She was so smooth with it that I chuckled to myself.   I’m not much of a girly girl, but once in a while I like a bit of color on my feet.  The men’s boxes only contained black, grey, brown and navy.    I bought two pairs of black socks that I could wear with my work trousers.  When the vendor was bagging my purchase, she threw in a pair of black footsies.  “Service,” she said, which to Koreans means complimentary or freebie.  I guess it was to ease the sting of wordlessly telling me that my feet were too big for the feminine socks.  

October 2012

Four Airports in 34 Hours

Incheon Airport, Seoul - Narita Airport, Tokyo – JFK Airport, New York – Dulles Airport, DC

The food court at JFK airport!  I didn’t know what to do with myself!

December 28, 2012 

That Time White Worship Backfired

Andrew and Vesta hosted a Christmas/farewell party at their high-rise apartment in Yongsan.  It was nice to see a bunch of people from my orientation there.  I chatted with Lisa, who had been placed at the main institute at the Seoul headquarters.  She was a petite blonde in her 20s from California who had come with her Chicano husband.   She was SO ready to leave.  From the moment she’d arrived, people were going on and on about her beautifully pale skin, small face, large blue eyes, blond hair and aquiline nose.  Photographers were constantly in her classroom, and sometimes, she was even pulled out of class for photoshoots.  She became the face of our hakwon chain’s new marketing campaign.  Her face was all over our posters and promotional literature.

Funnily enough, when the new brochures arrived at my hakwon, my Black South African co-worker had said, “See this?  False advertising.  These Koreans are going to sign up for classes with us thinking this blonde girl will be teaching them.”  Yeah, they were going to be sorely disappointed.  All the teachers at my branch were either dark-haired or brown skinned. 

Most people in her position would’ve eaten up all the adulation, but she was a decent kid uncomfortable with all the shallow attention.  “I came to teach, not to be a model,” she’d said in disgust.  What made it worse is that her olive-skinned husband was treated like chopped liver. 

When contract re-signing time came, she told them she was leaving at the end of her six-month contract.   They BEGGED her to stay.  Promises were made for a bigger apartment.  Raises (which are supposed to be strictly based on seniority and only after 12 months) and gifts were offered.  To their dismay, she was unmoved.  Their golden girl didn’t love them back.  Hadn’t they treated her like a princess?  Like a goddess, even?  That was the problem, some people don’t want to be worshipped for their appearance or for anything else, for that matter.  They just want to be treated like regular humans.

December 2012

Brief History of one Hakwon Company

My first job was at one of the oldest hakwon chains in Korea.  At that time it had over 42 branches all over the peninsula and Jeju island.   It is run by a Christian Protestant church.  The idea was to offer high quality English, Japanese and Chinese classes, as well as free Bible-based conversation classes.  For the first four decades, the chain prospered.  It was highly respected and enjoyed the reputation of having honest, dedicated teachers.  That began to erode starting around 2010 when competition exploded.  Language institutes popped up everywhere and some charged lower prices.  Then came the multi-hakwons, where one could study any variety of subjects, not just languages.  Children didn’t have to criss-cross the city going to their various afterschool classes.  They could do it all—music, calligraphy, martial arts, language, math—in one place.  That was the beginning of the end. 

Another major contributing factor to the chain’s decline is that headquarters always appointed pastors to be institute directors, never people with a business or education background.  Since they had no female pastors, this also meant that the directors were also always men.  Many branches have since closed down because of mismanagement. The Incheon branch, which is where I worked is no longer there.  All things considered, that they lasted as long as they did is the real surprise. 

At around the same time that competitors made their appearance, they began having trouble recruiting teachers because they were paying less than the general going rate.  Since many new teachers were recent university graduates, they were looking to earn decent money so they could start making a dent in the mountain of student debt they had amassed. People with E-2 teacher visas were receiving missionary wages.  If they wanted to pay their teachers as if they were missionaries, their visas and benefits should match. 

The institute directors were not the only ones to blame.  There was mismanagement from the top of the organization all the way down.  Important decisions were made, not based on what was best for the schools, but on organizational politics.  There was a lot of petty drama (which I don’t even know the half of) that impeded properly running the hakwon business.  Then again, that was the problem, the chain had not originally been meant to become a money-maker.  It was supposed to be a ministry that also provided a valuable service.  When they started seeing success in the 1990s, the leadership got dollar signs in their eyes and expanded, ignoring the schools’ initial purpose.  Years later, even as they saw things visibly declining, they were hellbent on doing everything the way it had always been done and fully expecting to see different results.  The few changes that were made were mere window dressing.

As mentioned in a previous post, the two main reasons why I did not renew my six-month contract with the company was that the split-schedule was affecting my health, and I did not want to have a roommate.   A third reason that I didn’t mention is that I prefer to keep my religious and work life separate.  Boundaries are important.  It’s easy for boundaries to be trampled when different parts of your life are intertwined.  There is such a thing as too much togetherness.  Familiarity breeds contempt. 

Mannam/Shincheonji: The First Cult to Court Me

One of my co-workers received an invitation to an international festival.  She already had plans for that Sunday, so she passed the information on to me.  I made plans to go.  A few days later, when we were at Bupyeong underground mall, two older women saw and made a beeline for me, all smiles.  They invited me to the same international festival.  

August 19.  In the morning I went to the meeting point by the McDonald’s outside of Bupyeong Station to take a free bus to the event.  When I arrived, Seokbin, a university student volunteer, took my name and had me stand in line.  A couple minutes later he brought a foreigner to stand next to me.  We introduced ourselves.  He was Lukas, a 19-year-old German metalhead.  In Germany young men were expected to either do one year of military service or, for conscientious objectors, one year of voluntary service.  Although that system had just recently been discontinued, Lukas had decided to come to Korea to do a year of voluntary service.  He was helping out at a community center that organized day programs for disabled people.  Cool. 

We chatted as buses filled up and the line moved forward.  When we finally got on a bus, we were given name tags and asked for our phone numbers.  I didn’t have a phone, so they said Lukas and I had to stay together throughout the festival so that if anything happened, I could use his phone.  Okay…  He seemed cool, so I didn’t mind, but if something were to happen, couldn’t I ask anybody for their phone?  I felt like they were treating us like little kids paired up on a field trip.  We must take care of the helpless foreigners.     

It was organized by Mannam Volunteer Association.  The venue was huge and admission was free.  Almost all the games and activities were free.  The only thing you really had to pay for was food.  And even then, we were given ₩3000 worth of food vouchers to use at the food vendors.  Lukas wondered where all the money was coming from to fund this.  Their literature was heavy on photos and light on print.  I wondered what sorts of volunteer activities they did.  You know I’m all for volunteerism. 

The festival was fun.  There were demonstration tents, tables to try out crafts, traditional Korean games, activities for children and adults, a booth where you could try on hanbok.  A mini-parade with a brass band that marched through the main area (why were they playing John Philip Souza’s Stars & Stripes Forever, though?).  Lukas even got free acupuncture on his bad knee.  He and I were not the only foreigners.  There were many others from all over, especially southern Asians.  Tons of photographers were everywhere and whenever they pointed their cameras at people, instead of the customary peace sign, they raised their hands in the Mannam salute.

Two things struck me as weird.  First, everyone at the festival was super-smiley and friendly.  This was unusual because Koreans usually don’t smile and chat with people they don’t know.  Second, the closing ceremony struck me as churchy.  A bunch of people marched onto the amphitheater’s stage waving flags of the world.  Then everyone sang a song that sounded like a hymn about happiness and unity.  Afterward, several staff members individually asked me if I’d enjoyed myself.  They gave me a flyer and said that their next event was a peace festival with sports tournaments, almost like a mini-Olympics and that I mustn’t miss it.     

In the following weeks, Seokbin, invited me to several smaller group events:  to miniature land, to a beer festival, dancing and to eat pizza.  For whatever reasons, I was unable to go to any of them.    Actually, I was free for the dancing, but I’d feel a plum fool going to the club with a bunch of kids half my age, so I didn’t.  I think Lukas went to one or two events.  It wasn’t until much later that I realized that it was a deliberate effort to maintain contact during the weeks between the international festival and the peace festival (after which the invitations dried up).

September 11. Was stopped on the street by two women who wanted to tell me about Mannam.  Despite the fact that neither spoke English, they were still trying.  I showed them a flyer for the peace festival, and once I let them know that I’m a friend of Seokbin’s they hugged me, smiled and went on their way.  I wondered again what motivates older people to have such zeal for Mannam. 

September 12. I discovered through BSSK that Mannam had recently suffered a blow to their reputation because it was revealed that their major contributor is a questionable religious group rumored to be a cult.  I also read Mannam’s response letter to the allegations.  Maybe I won’t go. 

I watched a couple YouTube videos about the organization.  One by Michael Aronson.  More damning evidence against them.    

September 15. During our Facebook chat Lukas said that he won’t be going to the peace festival either because he heard about Mannam’s issues.  He’s particularly sensitive to this because he lost a close friend to a cult in Germany.

As far as I understand it, Mannam is a group that does all the run-of-the-mill cult things like alienate its members from their families and friends, pressure members to do endless fundraising for the organization, et cetera.  Korean members are the most at risk.  The reasons why they like to have lots of foreigners at their events (and take tons of photos of and with them) is to lend credibility to the organization. 

Later, Mannam changed its name to Shincheonji.  Same group, new name.  

Check out what Wikipedia has to say:  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shincheonji_Church_of_Jesus

Also, check out Michael Aronson's video.  It's from 2012, but it's still relevant.  

2012 

Aronson recently made more videos about Shincheonji when the cult was back in the news in early 2020 because Patient 31, who was responsible with spreading COVID-19 all over Daegu, is a Shincheonji member.    

“Are you her father?”

We were practicing Handel’s Messiah and the choir was in need of more tenors and basses.  Each week the director asked us to invite friends who might want to sing with us.  I tried to recruit Uiyeol, who I’d noticed had a nice voice during song service in church.  He went twice, but was more interested in checking out the white women than singing.  Besides, he didn’t think he was good enough to sing with us (typical Korean perfectionism). 

Then I invited Mr. Ahn, who had serenaded me with a lovely rendition of ‘Love Me Tender’ one afternoon on the platform of Jemulpo Station.  He was in his 60s and had retired from working on a U.S. army base.  That’s where he’d learned how to speak English.  Ironically (or not), his speaking was more natural and correct than most of my Korean co-workers who had had formal language studies.   As we started up the hill toward the choir studio in Haebangcheon, he got a bit nervous.  “This place doesn’t look safe.  You must be careful,” he warned.

Each week, a different voice was tasked with bringing snacks we would eat during rehearsal break.  This week it was the altos’ turn.  I’d forgotten to purchase something in Incheon, so we stopped at a corner store near Bonnie’s Pizza.  The shop clerk looked us over silently as we entered.  When I was making my way to the register to pay for my boxes of cookies, he asked Mr. Ahn, “아버지세요?”  I stepped to the counter and said, “No, he’s not my father.”  Startled, he exclaimed in English, “You understand Korean?!”  I put the money on the counter and said, “Yes, and you’re rude.”  How dare he insinuate innuendo between sweet Mr. Ahn and me? 

Many Koreans believe that men and women cannot be friends. Also, people usually only have friends in their age group, so I understand that going somewhere together with Mr. Ahn must have raised eye brows.  However, every stupid thought that comes to your pea-sized brain need not come out of your mouth.  Had it not been so close to rehearsal time, I would’ve gone to a different shop for my snacks.  As we left, he apologized.  I gave him a dirty look.         

October 2012

Journal Excerpts From 09/2012, part 1

September 4:  A Religious Cult Tries to Recruit Me

Two women from the Worldwide Church of God who believe in God the Mother, caught up with me when I was on my way to the community center to get a class schedule.  Neither spoke English, but they were relentless in trying to communicate.  They asked for my telephone number, but when I told them that I had no phone, they wanted to know where I lived.  Wasn’t giving that info so they could start popping up at my door.  Finally, they gave a tract in English and gave up.  Got the schedule, but none of the classes I was interested in were given at a time convenient to me.  :/   I’ll have to keep looking for an exercise class. 

Edited to add:  check them out on Wikipedia.  I wonder what makes Korea so susceptible to religious cults.  They have way more than the average country. 

September 5:  Disco Hair

I wore an afro in the afternoon because I had washed my hair during the mid-day break.  When ten-year-old ‘Ben’ saw me, he exclaimed, “Teacher is disco hair!”  He’s so fat and cute. 

September 14:  “You have Friends?!” 

Jongsu, and adult student, and I were talking about Hongdae.  I mentioned that I’d gone to a café there with some friends.  His response was utter surprise “You have friends?!”  I laughed and said “Yes, three or four.  How long should I be here before I make friends?”  Embarrassed reply:  “I don’t know.”

September 15:   An Innocent Man

At church I lead out an informal class where we read and discussed a short, inspirational article.  ‘Paul’ was stuck on the name of the article’s author, McLarty, because ‘Mc’ doesn’t make a sound.  He said that it’s very irregular.  I explained that it’s an Irish name, and in Ireland names beginning with ‘Mc’ are very common.  His Bible is from Central Prison in North Carolina.  Said he was not guilty of what he was sent there for.   Good to know?  If he WAS guilty, I hope it wasn’t for a violent crime.

After lunch I went to Yeonan Pier on bus 33.  It turned out to be a warm and sunny day, not cool and cloudy like I’d expected.  There was an open air trot concert.  Trot sounds very similar to Japanese enka.

Journal Excerpts From 09/2012, part 2

September 18:   Rudeness at the Store & Doing Business With the Seamstress

Tried to buy index cards at the grocery store, but the stationery section was closed.  A halmoni cut me in line all pressed to pay for two packs of gum.  Was she having a halitosis emergency?  I was just as annoyed at the cashier for taking her when I was standing right there.  I left my two items on the belt and I walked out of the store.  Went and bought some at Daiso where the service is great.  It’s run by an older couple and their son. 

Went to the seamstress at Jemulpo Station underground to get a hole in the navy Mizrahi dress (thanks, Charlene!) fixed.  She was friendly and unbothered by the language barrier.  The ajumma who she took ahead of me apologized several times and complimented my hair ((after asking if it was a perm).  The seamstress gave me what I thought was a root to chew on.  When I put it in my mouth I realized it was dried fish and I discreetly put it in my backpack.  As soon as I got outside I threw it away.

Went back home, got the orange sarong and my black fish print tunic.  Returned to the seamstress.  Had her mend a tear in my flower print summer dress.  Then gave her the sarong and tunic.  She knew what I wanted.  It will cost ₩20,000 because she’ll have to create a pattern.  It will be ready on Friday. 

Gave Elvis, my co-worker, two dresses and a blouse.  He’s collecting clothes for a project in RSA.  Ten hours after I had had the squid leg in my backpack my shawl and other stuff still smell of it.  ¡Ufa!

September 20:   Horny Ajeosshi

My 8 pm class is all men from the same company.  They’re all married and in their 30s and 40s, so Martha and Amanda refer to it as my ajeosshi class.  During today’s class I was running out of steam, so I pulled up a stool to do the speaking drills.  ‘Smith,’ who was sitting near me said something I didn’t understand, so I asked him to repeat.  Turns out he had said “Sharon Stone” referring to her famous scene in the movie Basic Instinct.  I was wearing a brown, ankle-length linen dress.  How did the horny bastard come up with that image based on how I was dressed? 

Bad Manners

Here’s a list of things Koreans regularly do that are considered bad manners in the West.

1.  Chew food with mouth open.

2.  Slurp soup.

3.  Cough and sneeze without covering mouth/nose.

4.  Ask people their age…especially as soon as you meet.

5.  Assume that foreigners don’t speak Korean and talk about them within earshot.   

6.  Cutting lines.  Shoving in crowds.  

7.  Point out perceived flaws about peoples’ appearance (pimples, weight, etc.).

8.  Taking photos of people (particularly of non-Koreans) without permission. 

April 2013

Working on Holidays

I worked a full eight hours today, New Year’s Day.  Same thing a week ago on Christmas Day.  Even the students didn’t want to be there.  “But teacher, today is Christmas!”  That’s the English village for you.  Gotta make that money. 

January 1, 2014

Disabled Beggars

I hate to see disabled people begging.  Everyone can do something to earn a living.  Begging is lazy and removes one’s dignity.  2014

I wrote the above when I began to notice people who were blind or deaf begging on trains.  Or lame men dragging themselves on makeshift skateboards at the farmer’s market begging for money.  I now realize that I was looking at things with very Western eyes.  To many in Korea, having a disabled child is considered shameful, so most of these babies end up in orphanages.  In fact, I read that the vast majority of children in the country’s many orphanages have at least one living parent.  Aside from disabled children, orphanages are full of able bodied children who simply had the misfortune of being born inconvenient.   

Most orphanages just house, feed, clothe children and send them to school.  Once they come of age, they’re on their own with no skills to help them survive out in the world.  Since students are tracked very early on, university is just a dream for a child without parents to push and encourage them.  And in Korea, many job applications ask for what amounts to a brief genealogy.  Since orphans are stigmatized by society, once an employer sees their application, they don’t even have a chance at getting an interview.  Moon Jae-in, the current president, is working to stop the practice of requiring applicants’ family histories as well as photos.  If able bodied people who grow up without parents have it so difficult, imagine a person with a disability who never got any sort of skills training.  At least some able bodied orphans manage to eke out a living doing odd jobs of unskilled labor.  

In the U.S. I have a friend who is blind who has held several jobs.  His first job was loading dishwashers in a restaurant.  When we met he sewed duffel bags for a company subcontracted by the military.  He lives in his own apartment, pays all his bills and doesn’t rely on any type of charity.  Of course, this is because he was able to get job training which helped make him employable.  People can do as much as they are able if they have the right support.  That concept is very new here.  In fact, Koreans are shocked that people with disabilities even marry and have families of their own in the West. 

Things are changing slowly.  Once in a while a see a woman out with her visibly disabled child, which means that some families are keeping their disabled children.  Not an easy feat in a society that still has far to go in their attitudes and way of thinking toward such people.  

I now understand that, in most cases, begging is not lazy.  It’s often the only means of survival in a place that doesn’t afford any chances to people who are different.

Incompetent Managers at English Village

Today I was scheduled to teach baking.  Got to Building 9 and TWO classes are already up there.  I go and tell ‘Jason’ (‘Alice’ is standing by his desk). Before he has a chance to answer, she jumps in with her nasty tone talking about “there’s a misunderstanding” and I should go back to class.  Kimmy’s class will go back to the classroom.  By then, we’re 15 minutes into the period…not enough time for a baking class.  I understand that ‘Jason’ prevailed because ‘Alice’ double booked and fouled up the schedule yet again—misunderstanding, my ass. 

I return to B9 and do what I can to do a speed class with my group.  Of course, they want to goof off.  By the way, there is no brownie mix, so we make scones.  They miss break time because we only got the pans into the oven at the top of the hour.  I get my next group and get things started.  Forget about the scones left in the oven ‘til it’s too late.  Ran into the kitchen where Aaron is with his class, and the scones are all burnt.  So after I’ve taught all my classes for the day, I eat dinner and go back to the kitchen to make three batches of scones to give the students from Room 203 tomorrow. 

Oh, and ‘Alice’ dragged her fat ass all the way up to the second floor of B9 to accusingly question Aaron about where he was supposed to be.  Since he didn’t have the schedule with him he couldn’t give a sure answer.  This broad makes scheduling mistakes regularly, but had the nerve to try to put the blame on somebody else.  I was glad for him when it turned out that he was in the right place according to the schedule. 

We get next week’s schedule.  It says I should teach baking “scorns” (ha!).  There’s a problem.  Next week I’ll have the same students.  They can’t make the same thing again.  I tell ‘Jason’ that he needs to order brownie mix.  He says I should make hot dogs.  I tell him that I don’t eat meat nor do I know how to prepare it, so I guess it will be scones again.  He pulls a face and walks out of my room.* 

By the way, he interrupted my class to come tell me that-----well, two things, really.  The other was that the principal of the students who I was teaching was coming to observe my class in a few minutes.  The bulk of the teacher-led part was over, so I was forced to stretch it out for when he came to observe.  Observations are never done that late into the period, but how would he know?  Yet, he manages teachers.

July 21, 2014

*Brownie mix magically appeared in the kitchen the next week. 

Why I Go All the Way to Seoul for Church: Reason #228

It was Pastor Kim’s week to preach.  When the time came, he introduced his sermon, put on a video of himself preaching and sat down.  What?  It’s bad enough Sabbath School is watched on video every week (no discussion or anything, just watching), but this is too ridiculous.  #Bootleg

August 16, 2014

A Tisket a Tasket, I Got a Basket!

Went back to the bike shop because the chain wouldn’t move when I tried to change gears.  The ajeossi fixed the problem.  Then I bought a basket.  Since the handlebars had to be raised in order to fit the basket (which was necessary anyway because they were too low), I also had him raise the seat.  It was so much more comfortable! 

And I was thrilled to death with the basket (₩10,000).  I’ve always wanted one for my bicycle and now I finally do.  I put my backpack in it and rode back to the village feeling fee.  Otherwise, my Chuseok break (all two days of it) was wasted.  Well, I did cook, but I didn’t do most of the things on my to-do list.  Who knows when I’ll have another long weekend. 

September 8, 2014

Dragonflies

I love a particular section of my walk to Yongmun by the exercise path parallel to the stream and the rice fields.  For some reason that area has tons of dragonflies flying around.  And dozens of them sitting on fences and electric lines.  They’re so pretty with their four transparent wings.  As they dip and zoom through the air they can be a bit scary, but I remind myself that they don’t sting or bite humans.  In fact they’re quite beneficial in that they eat mosquitos.  Walking through that area with all the dragonflies swarming high and low feels rather magical. 

August 17, 2014

Finger Lickin’ Good

Met up with Evaristus for tea and bagels at Tom & Tom in Itaewon.  Then he took me to check out Happy Home Nigerian restaurant’s new location.  There’s a sink in the dining area.  Every time a customer comes in, he (they were all men) greets everyone and heads to the sink to lather up and scrub his hands.  All restaurants should have this set up.  I enjoyed watching the men eat with their hands.  Every time they licked or sucked their fingers, it made me think that what they were eating was delicious. 

June 2014

My Skin Feels Brand New

Got scrubbed down at the jjimjilbang in Itaewon.  The desk clerks are jerks, but the old ladies who work in the bathing area are very nice.  Based on the tons of dead skin left on the table, those halmonis really earned their pay.  I feel so shiny and clean.  It was worth every penny.

Afterwards I had brunch at the Flying Pan. Yum!

December 27, 2015

My Afterschool Job is off to a Great Start (not really)

December 1:  After school ‘John’ told me that my role is to be the fun teacher. I play games.   He teaches straight out of the book. Thanks for letting me know in advance, pal.  That would’ve been good info to have last Friday when the parents came to observe my class or, you know, before I started teaching at all. 

December 10:  ‘John’ criticized the telephone game I lead out in class.  It would’ve gone better if he had cared to help translate the instructions.  Instead, he sat there scrolling on his phone.  Not only that, I got the game from the book he gave me. 

December 16:  As my co-teacher, ‘John’ is supposed to remain in the classroom during the lesson in case students need a concept explained or instructions translated.  But this lout regularly sneaks out the back door 15 minutes into the lesson and doesn’t return until the period is almost over.  Today, two boys got into a fight while he was AWOL.  I asked him to please stay in the classroom during lessons.  If he had been there when the argument had begun, it would not have escalated to a fistfight.  This jerk had the nerve to blame me for not controlling the class.  Umm, discipline is not my duty, feckless oaf.  I’m the fun teacher, remember?  Besides, if students are fussing back and forth, they need someone to shut it down in their own language. 

A couple weeks ago something he did and said made me think that he’d had a crush (if not a full-on affair) with the white South African teacher who preceded me.  If my suspicion is correct, then I cannot compete.  I will never be her.  Is he angry that she left mid-contract?  The story they fed me is that she left because her mother had a heart attack, but now I wonder.  Is he trying to set me up to fail? 

At my interview the manager told me that my co-teacher spoke excellent English because he had lived in Los Angeles for 10 years.  When I met him for the first time, I thought to myself, either he lied or he spent his entire time in a basement in Koreatown. I know people who speak much better English after only one year abroad.  I almost feel sorry for his wife and three kids for having such a loser as a father and husband.

You know what else sucks?  He’s the intermediary between me and the company’s manager and director.  Ugh!

    

2015